The writer's strike is over, Barack Obama has taken the lead against Hillary Clinton, Mike Huckabee still thinks he has a chance and "Saturday Night Live" will return to air within the month.
How do these relate? They all tie in to my homegrown political theory that has shaped the face of our nation since 1975, when the phrase, "Live from New York, it's Saturday night!" came screaming into our living rooms.
Allow me to present to you, my dear readers, the "SNL Presidential Nomination Theory."
I believe the winner of the presidential election will be determined, not by savvy campaigning, the electoral college, the popular vote, grassroots politics or whatever you've been taught by our fine political science department here at Towson.
Instead, the position of commander-in-chief will go to whomever NBC's skit comedy show can poke the most fun at (please exhale).
Take for example, the last 16 years of presidential reign and how close the margin of victory came for each would-be head-honcho. George W. Bush narrowly earned a seat in the Oval Office against both John Kerry and Al Gore.
Let's break this down. Al "I speak very monotone, but try to be funny, all the while I like to hug trees" Gore, lost to a man that cannot pronounce nuclear, or most English words for that matter. Which is something "SNL" has clung to in their portrayal of his character.
And then there is John "Lurch from 'The Addams Family'" Kerry, who actually received more votes than the incumbent president but still failed to switch his address to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
My point is that Kerry would've been mocked for his stoic demeanor and "Lurch-like" attitude, while Gore, despite not making it to broadcast television, has had a recurring role as a environmental super-hero on Comedy Central's "South Park."
In eight years, half a dozen "Saturday Night Live" actors and alumni (including Will Farrell) have taken shots at imitating good ol' "W." He's just barely a funnier candidate.
The connection is based from ease of material.
Let us take a step beyond Bush to Billy Boy.
President Clinton wins his first term and then landslides the next go around against Bob Dole.
No one knew about Clinton at first, other than he was different and young.
Four years later he's steeped in more political scandal than four Tom Clancy novels. Not only did he make himself available for constant ridicule by "SNL," but also he brought characters with him! Stained dressed intern Monica Lewinsky and face-lift famous Linda Tripp also became characters on "SNL."
But all that is in the past.
During the writers' strike, I was worried that my little theory would fall by the wayside. However, given that the show will start soon, according to a plug by guest host Tina Fey, I am more convinced than ever that Campaign '08 will be the closest dash for the presidency in our lifetime.
Think of the possibilities! A woman, an African-American man, a former pastor (who doesn't believe in evolution) and the Crypt Keeper (aka: John McCain) are all vying for the job.
Now I will say, Hillary Clinton is a touch on the boring side, so her only success (as far as my theory goes) stems from the man she shares her bed with. The residual hilarity that would ensue from Billy back in the White House has carried Mrs. Clinton to where she is now.
Also, being a senator of New York has helped her, given the location of show.
Despite the current polling results (that have Obama in the lead for the Democratic Primaries) I do not think he will win. He seems very unfunny.
He speaks extremely well, doesn't have a shady background, admitted to smoking (and inhaling) marijuana, and I highly doubt Keanan Thompson will drop the 50 pounds needed to even consider portraying the senator from Illinois. He is one of the few politicos to not have a consistent portrayal on the show. Perhaps Tim Meadows will realize he peaked with "The Ladies Man" and return home.
On to the GOP. Don't you think it's kind of odd that a presidential hopeful actually makes it down to the final two of seven candidates on a single platform? Rudy Guiliani tried with "Look at me, I was the mayor during 9/11" and we saw how well that worked for him. Guiliani…not funny, kind of scary, definitely mafia related.
But back to my point.
Huckabee will not be the Republican candidate for office, but he made a good effort, considering he doesn't believe in evolution and don't even get me started on how he feels about homosexuality.
The Republican frontrunner, McCain, is old, like ancient (hence the Crypt Keeper reference). While this alone is not enough to win him the highest seat in power, the combination of old and wrinkly, mixed with religious zealot equals one hilarious "SNL" skit.
It's not my place to predict who will become the next president of the United States, but I will say, he (or she) will be funny.
Nick DiMarco is a junior mass communication major and The Towerlight's associate news editor.
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