2008 Woodie Awards
Happy Hour: Don't mess with pepper spray
Evan Porter
Opinion | 4/16/08
There's nothing funny about Mace. I'm talking about pepper spray, of course, and not the rapper (there are plenty of funny things about him). Sure, no one talks about it anymore because Tasers are the popular thing now, but Mace can still mess you up pretty badly. There's something to be said about the old fashioned ways of hurting people; they might be outdated, but I'll be damned if they don't work. Just because no one uses enormous wooden clubs anymore doesn't mean I want to be on the receiving end of one.
I have heard so many horror stories about people screwing around with Mace and regretting it.
For example, I have one friend who actually wanted his friends to spray him in the face on the condition that they surprise him and get it on film.
Of course, afterwards he realized it was an awful price to pay for a funny video, but at least now he knows. On Friday night I had the pleasure of witnessing yet another friend learn the hard way that Mace is nothing to play around with.
My friend and I were walking around Federal Hill with his girlfriend when she dropped her keys on the pavement. She carries Mace on her key chain, and when the container hit the ground it popped out of its casing and rolled across the sidewalk.
My friend, being the gentleman that he is, picked it up for her and offered to try to fit it back into its shell. We watched nervously as he fiddled with the black plastic vile and finally pressed it back into place. It went in without incident, but we all felt the need to do a test spray to make sure it was working properly and also because we thought it would be cool. What harm could there be in spraying a little bit into the night air and then walking briskly in the opposite direction?
Probably not much, but when that went well, my friend's girlfriend wanted a test spray of her own. That, too, went well and we were all on our way. We all stopped to urinate in someone's backyard before the drive home.
I have heard so many horror stories about people screwing around with Mace and regretting it.
For example, I have one friend who actually wanted his friends to spray him in the face on the condition that they surprise him and get it on film.
Of course, afterwards he realized it was an awful price to pay for a funny video, but at least now he knows. On Friday night I had the pleasure of witnessing yet another friend learn the hard way that Mace is nothing to play around with.
My friend and I were walking around Federal Hill with his girlfriend when she dropped her keys on the pavement. She carries Mace on her key chain, and when the container hit the ground it popped out of its casing and rolled across the sidewalk.
My friend, being the gentleman that he is, picked it up for her and offered to try to fit it back into its shell. We watched nervously as he fiddled with the black plastic vile and finally pressed it back into place. It went in without incident, but we all felt the need to do a test spray to make sure it was working properly and also because we thought it would be cool. What harm could there be in spraying a little bit into the night air and then walking briskly in the opposite direction?
Probably not much, but when that went well, my friend's girlfriend wanted a test spray of her own. That, too, went well and we were all on our way. We all stopped to urinate in someone's backyard before the drive home.
Viewing Comments 1 - 2 of 2
Annie
posted 4/17/08 @ 6:19 PM EST
Your friend deserved what he got for urinating in someone's backyard. How rude. Next time, find an appropriate bathroom.
safely protect
posted 4/18/08 @ 4:27 AM EST
Ya, i agree with the point that although the mace is outdated one but it can cause major impact when used.
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